Who am I..

December 13^th..2013..A cold winter night in North India..It is past midnight..Another of my lucid dreams is about to strike..a  hypnagogic state in which I often receive direct guidance from my subconscious.. The physical body gets paralyzed..the conscious mind goes  back stage..it  does come back on and off to ask questions..but is clearly on a back seat..My Higher Self takes over..The guidance flows through words..in symbols..telepathically..or in visions..sometimes it turns dreamlike..I surrender..I participate..I overflow with my own receptivity..and I remember..Its a  magical connection which I wait for every moment..

A voice rings in my ears..its a male voice..You are Vetravati..it whispers..Vetravati..what a strange word..Sanskrit..My conscious mind springs up…Never heard of it..Difficult to pronounce as well..The whisper becomes persuasive now..Your name is Vetravati..It proclaims in Hindi..Now the mind repeats the word Vetravati twice lest it forgets it..

Then a screen switches on in my third eye..and I see the anatomy of a human chest..first the outside then the frame shifts to the inside…from skin to muscles and then a passage inside..labrynthine it is..my head reels..the gate of the Sacred Heart..the door to the higher Consciousness..the frame shakes and the vision does not hold for long..

Then a beautiful music erupts in my ears..and  Sanskrit shlokas..in a female voice..they go on for sometime..they faintly resemble the rendition of Vishnu Sahasranaamam the 1000 names of Vishnu by M.S Subbhalaxmi to which I have been drawn of late..But the voice is gentler and the music ethereal..Not that I understand any of the shlokas..I am zapped..Its as if an internal radio has been switched on..its so loud and clear..It wakes me up..To a  pindrop silence..a Sacred Secret silence..of the winter night..the cold bites and I am forced to drift off to sleep..

Later I google Vetravati..information is popping up..

Vetra means rod/staff..Vetravati..a woman who hold the staff..a doorkeeper..

Vetravati..one of the 1000 names of Radha in Shri Radha Sahasranaamam

Vetravati..in Kalidasa’s Shakuntla is the principal female steward in King Dushyant’s court..

Vetravati..Vedic name of River Betwa, a tributary of theYamuna..mentioned in Mahabharata..

 So here  I am..Vetravati..the  Gatekeeper..the Doorkeeper..

Which gates do I hold open..

What am I letting in..

Which way do I show..

Which torch do I shine..

Which path do I light up..

Which energetic bridge do I provide..

What space do I hold..

What vibrational template I have to offer..

Which frequencies do I adjust..

Welcome to the  New Awareness..

Welcome to the Connectedness..

The Harmony of the Self to All That Is..

Welcome to the Portal of Love..Light and Multidimensionality..

The Gate is open..

Just step in..

 It is available to all who seek it at this time..

Come..Be a part of the Holy Shift..

Love and Light..

Tejaswini..

Amritam..Healing with Water..

New Year..New Self..

The last morning of 2013…The countdown begins of the last hours of a year that has been trying and challenging..I am awake.. still and silent in bed waiting for the day to dawn..Silently I connect to my Higher self..I call upon all those aspects..those fragments of myself..that seem to be lost somewhere..I command them..to return and reclaim..I wonder about my origins..my family..before I took this embodiment..my physical vehicle..and how strongly I desire to return to where I belong..

Strange energies are pressing on me..The other night a voice.. was trying to tell me who I really was..whispering strange names..Playing beautiful shlokas in my ears..Another time animals giving me strange messages..Not that I could really decipher everything..What was to happen now ??

Suddenly my body jerks..I realize it is stationary but something is getting pulled out of it sideways..I am being pulled out..laterally..and then..with a gentle swish..I am out..and I am journeying..Now I am sinking..slowly..down and down..I suddenly realize I am underwater..and I can feel the bubbles. the sinking is calm and peaceful..very relaxing..I must have covered some depths..when suddenly I feel as if my legs have been folded..and I am getting propelled upwards..

I shoot upwards like a torpedo and out of the water. And up I go like a rocket..once again I travel some distance and then I am made to float..face upwards..A beautiful night sky looks down upon me..millions of stars and celestial bodies..its exhilarating..and I move gently forwards..as I travel gently..I pass a portal in the sky..there is gate..its shaped like a Chakra..a wheel..I count the spokes..7 exactly..I want to enter..but its not for me..I am only to relax and admire the celestial beauties above me..And then when it is over..I find that I have descended..I am on the bank of a lake and from there I am back..to where I was..in my bed..Slightly light headed but delighted with my underwater and cosmic adventures.

I realize I am multidimensional..A dancing configuration of energy..
I exist simultaneously outside time and space..
I can exist without limitation..
I can expand my inner world to encompass the Universe and beyond..
I am a Creative being..A Master of my own energies..
I perform my own miracles every day...♥♥

Love and light..And a New beginning to all..
Tejaswini..

Soham..The Song of the Breath..

The Sacred Breath..The Breathwork Circle..

Which Wolf Wins ??

                             

My busy everyday work schedule..In the midst of all the storm I try to find my centre..I manage to shut myself up for an hour during lunch time for my Kriya practice.I guess I am lucky..My people don’t disturb me..They know what I am upto..so except for some occasional urgent outstation calls I am mostly able to sail through 

Yesterday.. I am about to wind up my Kriya..A beautiful white apparition..A dog..Was it a wolf ?..Not clear.. Friendly but vigilant ..Pure white..He simply walks in through a door of my inner vision..looks around..our eyes meet..he gazes for sometime., and then he is gone..Thought it wagged its tail as well..Loved him..Wish he could have stayed longer with me..

As I think about his white sublime presence now..I’m reminded of this beautiful Native American story..

“One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. He said, "My son, the battle is between 2 "wolves" inside us all.

One is Black.. Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

The other is White..Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: "Which wolf wins?"

The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

Makes me wonder..what am I feeding my Mind and Heart with ? Is it Black or is it White..But nothing is really that Black and White in life..Isn’t it ? 

Am I happy..joyful..peaceful..loving..generous all the time ? Not really..I have my fair hits of highs and lows every day..Sadness..anger..regret..negativity.. they keep creeping in and out..off and on..

The trick is in recognizing and accepting the Black Wolf when it comes..and letting it slowly pass by..finding out ways to let it go gently....welcoming the White Wolf..when it does surface and nurturing it through any means that we possibly can..Yoga..Meditation..Exercise..Hobbies..Friends..Pursuits..
Passions..anything that fills life with joy,peace,positivity and direction....

Being at Home wherever I am..Experiencing the inner joy deep within me...Going outside..Looking at the stars..the rocks..the trees..birds and flowers..spilling that inner joy into song & laughter ..even tears of gratitude..becoming more and more available to opportunities that are to celebrate in life..Dancing in the storm 

A little wisdom..A little foolishness..

Being..Allowing..Receiving..Celebrating..

Thank you White Wolf for the gentle reminder....

Love and Gratitude 

The Wisdom of Kali

As I meditate on my Mooladhara Chakra.. the Root Chakra..gently breathing into the base of my spine.. the vision of Kali’s face suddenly looms up..Red tongue..big eyes.. but it is Kali with a difference…no violence..no intoxication..no anger..the face is peaceful ..the eyes are serene..they look at me..they radiate compassion and peace.. the eyes of a mother..the Kundalini Mother..

My first vision of Kali..in her benign form..I wonder what she brings..What wisdom does she awaken..I ponder and I search..

“..In Tantra the goddess or female force Shakti is worshipped. Shakti is the power of the Kundalini energy dormant in the Muladhara chakra.

When Kundalini awakens, we start to experience all the many aspects of the goddess as we go through a spiritual rebirth. These aspects are represented by the ten mahavidyas (ten wisdom goddesses). As we experience each of the manifestations of the wisdom goddess, we receive the lessons associated with that goddess as we approach self-realisation. One of the aspects to be experienced is the goddess Kali.

Kali in Sanskrit means time. In time everything changes, grows and develops and goes beyond time itself. Time is a conscious energy and could be described as a womb giving it a female connotation. We look back in time and see how we have changed and how we have no control on the birth, decay and death cycle, and we look forward which is inevitable. Time is precious, yet we lose it and we become attached causing suffering and grasping…Kali teaches us to give up our attachment and help us develop mastery over time.

Time is both creation and destruction. In order to create, we must destroy in order to make space for the new, which means we must first let go of the old, releasing our attachment to material nature and go beyond earthly bondage. In order to be delivered beyond our suffering we must relinquish ego and surrender it to Kali.

                                      

 Kali is the goddess of destruction and she destroys everything in her path except Shiva himself. Through our own life force (life force being prana, prana is delivered throughout the body in the blood) we experience time, and Kali is also represented as Prana, the divine mother of our life who gives us the vital energy and power for our bodily system. As such, Kali is associated with blood and is often depicted drinking the blood of all beings representing life digesting and renewing itself. Time is responsible for our death and decay, and that which has no real substance, meaning that Kali is also death in that she is the doorway to the eternal.

By meditating on Kali, you are meditating on the rhythms of life; death to life, life to death and beyond. Worries, anxieties, separateness and attachments will die daily if you meditate on Kali.
Kali also relates to the air element, Vayu as she is mobile, subtle and transformative. She is the lightening that transforms quickly, unpredictably and radically. Her perception of truth is like lightening, dissolving illusion. In our body, air exists as prana hence her pranic association..."

Love and Light..